When I first opened this book, There’s Nothing Wrong With You, I felt like I was more spiritually and emotionally advanced than anything this book had to offer. I was wrong. The font is big and the wording is simple for a reason. We have been socially trained from the moment we were born unrelentingly up through the present that there IS something wrong with us. This book is speaking to the child in all of us that still believes that fully.
Huber speaks over and over to this social conditioning of self-hate –the training of us that we’re doing something wrong, that we could’ve, should’ve, would’ve done something better, more, smarter, faster. The voice of self-hate is constant and comes in many forms.
Sometimes the self-hate is not even subtle — “You’re fat.” “You’re ugly.” “You’re stupid.” “You suck.” Sometimes it disguises itself in “helpful” comments — “I was stupid to say that. I should be more careful.” Sometimes it sounds supportive of self-discipline — “I have to keep working on this, even though I’m exhausted. If I let myself slide, who knows where it will end?” Sometimes it even sounds wise, profound and really helpful — you’re reading a meaningful book and every sentence translates into “I should be like that.” “How come I’m not more like that?” Much of this deeply ingrained conditioning finds root by the time we’re seven years old. How long ago is that for you? No wonder why it takes some time to undo.
Huber also speaks to a radical form of acceptance in loving ourselves unconditionally — unconditionally in the sense of No Matter What, unconditionally for all times, for all circumstances, unconditionally when you feel like it & unconditionally when you don’t feel like it. Unconditional love and acceptance means just that — no conditions, loving the all of you & accepting the all of you.
Huber states, “We must become our own best friend. We must learn to give to ourselves and to receive from ourselves unconditional love and acceptance. It is not selfish. It is the first GIANT STEP toward selfLESSness….Those who feel completely loved are not selfish, they are loving.”
Any of you who have the courage & heart to begin this path of radical acceptance, please post here to encourage the rest of us.
Much love, Jodi